I learned a very important lesson last night: Don't buy things you can't read. I was seduced by thin, chocolate-looking, scalloped-edged cookies. After a hard first day back at work after vacation, I sat down with a cup of tea and the cookies.
The brand is U(with an umlaut)lker and they are Kakaolu Bisku ('nother umlaut)vi.
With great anticipation, I decided to try the top broken cookie. And they taste like .......... nothing. That's right, nothing. Although they do have a nice crunch so I decided to dunk them. Ahhh ... that was good.
You have to use a proper dunking technique: dunk, twist, lift. That ensures that the soggy part of the cookie makes it to your mouth. I enjoyed a nice couple of cookies, but then I got cocky and delayed too long between twist and lift. Yuck. Cookie matter floated in my tea. I survived, but barely.
*******************************************************************
So tonight after work, I go to pick up essentials such as dish washing soap. Bummer, eh? Anyway, I hand the card to the cashier. Our local supermarket hands out variously colored "coins" which get you money off future purchases. But to "earn" a coin, you press a game after they swipe your card and it's random as to whether you get a coin. I pressed "play" and it said ENTER YOUR PHONE NUMBER TO FIND CARD. I asked the cashier why it said that. She said, "Because your card is expired." It's a silver card and the silver coins are supposed to go right to the card.
The last time I was there, I threw out the other card because they told me it wouldn't work since I had a silver card. So I said to her, "How do I get this card un-expired?" She said, "It costs $20."
Now I know for a fact that I never paid $20 for the card -- but one day they gave it to me for free. I kept saying no, I don't want to pay $20 and, apparently, so did a lot of other people. "I threw out the old card because they told me it didn't work because I had this card."
"You mean the flag card?" she asked.(The other card had an American flag pattern on it.) "Yes, I said, " I threw that one out because they told me it didn't work any more." At this point, I was ready to become violent. "Will they give me a new flag card at the desk over there?"
"You don't need it!" she said, "because this one works. You just won't get the silver coins automatically."
Now is it me or does "expired" mean it won't work? Apparently, not in this situation. Sigh. I really, really hope that this young lady is not going to school to become a brain surgeon.
*************************************************************************
I answered the phone yesterday.
"Do you have a Joyce (not her real name) who works there and is in charge of buildings?"
"No."
"Well, let me tell you why I'm calling. I'm in charge of planning a party and we want to know if we can rent your back yard for the pony we're going to have. Can we do that?"
[While not a huge library, the Jones Library IS in the middle of Town and "the back yard" is a memorial garden lovingly constructed by a widow with a lot of money and knowledge of rare plants and trees. The thought of a pony calming munching on blooms surrounded by many vinca trampling rug rats appeared in my brain.]
"No!"
After further conversation, I realized that she should have called the Bangs Center because the Town owns the building and property of the Munson Memorial Library -- we just rent the library space. This person had garbled the information and Joyce actually works at the Bangs and books the hall (notice I did not say yard) for the Munson.
After she hung up, I wondered who would be the pooper scooper for the pony. I sure hope that isn't what they mean by "Other duties as assigned," which is on the bottom of every Town job description.
******************************************************************
Two people told me today that there is a bobcat living in South Amherst. I live in South Amherst, but this guy was spotted couple of miles east of here. Anyway, it's salamander season and another phone call (not to me) began with, "Where do I let it go?!?" Upon hearing this, I wondered if she meant her temper, her flatulence, or what? Turns out, she was talking about a salamander.
Put him near the tunnel! Yes, we do have a salamander tunnel. But I digress ... really, there is a train of thought here. It's the tracks that are convoluted. IF the woman put the salamander in eastern south Amherst and the bobcat ate him, the bobcat could be enjoying an old standard: surf and turf!
Phew. It took a while to get there, didn't it?
*********************************************************************
O.k. I'm going to go now and eat the chili I just made. I'm putting some salsa picante on it. I know what that means: yum!
Tuesday, April 29, 2014
Friday, April 18, 2014
Palm Springs, I Love You
So last Wednesday was one of the landscapers' days. I hear a roar and Mom says, "Is that a plane?" It was Miguel or Jose, I couldn't tell because he had a full face mask and sun hat, roaring around in a little truck with a tank on it. Since he had a full hazmat suit on (as Dave Barry says, I'm not making this up!), I screamed, "Close the doors!" Mom has a floor to ceiling sliding glass door looking out into the common area which was about to be sprayed with gene busting chemicals. Let us mark this down as the only time my mother did what she was told. (Don't beat me, Momma, I still love you.)
*****************************************************************
The evening news is on and since Easter falls on 4-20, a local burger purveyor has changed his ad a bit. (Apparently, 420 is a reference to marijuana.) He is selling a God Burger and on Easter, you buy one and get one free. So this year's traditional picture of Jesus holding the burger is also holding a joint. The store owner say, "If he was holding a chalice of wine, you wouldn't be here talking to me."
Well, I don't know about that. Do we have it on good authority that Jesus ate burgers? I know for a fact that he didn't eat cheeseburgers! No self respecting Jew would.
*****************************************************************
The news also informed us that the Honey Baked Ham store had a line out the door and around the block with people picking up over 500 hams. They expected to sell more tomorrow. Who knew, first of all, that there is a whole store with nothing but Homey Baked Hams? Secondly, how do they survive when it's not Easter?
******************************************************************
Everybody keeps asking what my plans are while I'm here. Here it is: nothing. I'm having a great time doing nothing. Although, as you may have noticed, I love observing people and things.
The other day, we brought Mom's car to the car wash. That always fascinates me when I'm here because they run the car through a quick wash and then many handsome Mexican guys swarm all over the vehicle like scrubbing and drying bees making honey. It's a grand sight to behold (two or more cars are done at a time) as you recline in a chair next to the fountain, surrounded by blooming flowers. The cars are under a shade and the outdoor patio is shaded. It's like being at a mini resort where they take care of your car.
When we got there, they always try to up-sell you. "You need a full detail," the first guy said. "Oh, I don't have time for that," Mom replied. The second guy said, "How much time you got?" I laughed, but as we walked away, Mom told me that a full detail takes all day and costs about $300. Holy crow! For $300 I think they should throw in a day at that Spa (Agua Caliente, aka Hot Springs) and lunch!
*******************************************************************
We can hear lots of sirens tonight. It's the second weekend of the Coachella Music Festival. They had one young attendee die from suspected alcohol and illegal drug poisoning. Let's hope there are not more. They expected 10,000 people. Needless to say, we ate at home tonight. (Yesterday we had dinner at the Camelot Theatre -- no show, just dinner.)
*******************************************************************
I was deeply saddened to break the strap on my gold lame sandals so we went to Marshall's to replace them. I was delighted to get gold sneakers and some strappy sandals that were adequate. I got a purse which Mom declared won't "go" with anything but I like it. I nearly swallowed my tongue when the cashier said, "That will be $125 please." It turns out the adequate sandals were $49.95! It never occurred to me! The cashier said huffily, "Well, they are Coach sandals." At Marshalls no less. I put the sandals back.
********************************************************************
There are LOTS of ads for plastic surgery here. The last ad on tv promised to melt fat away. Do you slosh when you get up off the table?
*****************************************************************
The evening news is on and since Easter falls on 4-20, a local burger purveyor has changed his ad a bit. (Apparently, 420 is a reference to marijuana.) He is selling a God Burger and on Easter, you buy one and get one free. So this year's traditional picture of Jesus holding the burger is also holding a joint. The store owner say, "If he was holding a chalice of wine, you wouldn't be here talking to me."
Well, I don't know about that. Do we have it on good authority that Jesus ate burgers? I know for a fact that he didn't eat cheeseburgers! No self respecting Jew would.
*****************************************************************
The news also informed us that the Honey Baked Ham store had a line out the door and around the block with people picking up over 500 hams. They expected to sell more tomorrow. Who knew, first of all, that there is a whole store with nothing but Homey Baked Hams? Secondly, how do they survive when it's not Easter?
******************************************************************
Everybody keeps asking what my plans are while I'm here. Here it is: nothing. I'm having a great time doing nothing. Although, as you may have noticed, I love observing people and things.
The other day, we brought Mom's car to the car wash. That always fascinates me when I'm here because they run the car through a quick wash and then many handsome Mexican guys swarm all over the vehicle like scrubbing and drying bees making honey. It's a grand sight to behold (two or more cars are done at a time) as you recline in a chair next to the fountain, surrounded by blooming flowers. The cars are under a shade and the outdoor patio is shaded. It's like being at a mini resort where they take care of your car.
When we got there, they always try to up-sell you. "You need a full detail," the first guy said. "Oh, I don't have time for that," Mom replied. The second guy said, "How much time you got?" I laughed, but as we walked away, Mom told me that a full detail takes all day and costs about $300. Holy crow! For $300 I think they should throw in a day at that Spa (Agua Caliente, aka Hot Springs) and lunch!
*******************************************************************
We can hear lots of sirens tonight. It's the second weekend of the Coachella Music Festival. They had one young attendee die from suspected alcohol and illegal drug poisoning. Let's hope there are not more. They expected 10,000 people. Needless to say, we ate at home tonight. (Yesterday we had dinner at the Camelot Theatre -- no show, just dinner.)
*******************************************************************
I was deeply saddened to break the strap on my gold lame sandals so we went to Marshall's to replace them. I was delighted to get gold sneakers and some strappy sandals that were adequate. I got a purse which Mom declared won't "go" with anything but I like it. I nearly swallowed my tongue when the cashier said, "That will be $125 please." It turns out the adequate sandals were $49.95! It never occurred to me! The cashier said huffily, "Well, they are Coach sandals." At Marshalls no less. I put the sandals back.
********************************************************************
There are LOTS of ads for plastic surgery here. The last ad on tv promised to melt fat away. Do you slosh when you get up off the table?
Wednesday, April 9, 2014
Is It Thursday Already?
More on the Blog About Nothing ...
Today's the day, the culmination of six months of planning. The Sammy Awards (first ever!) are tonight. It has been paperwork mayhem. O.k., o.k., pushing papers is what I do. But triple the usual amount and you get the idea.
So I've been tracking every ticket sold and for the first month, it was only $100 tickets. After April 1, there were $40 tickets, but for $40 you don't get a giclee of an original painting of Sammy the Owl numbered and signed by the artist, Tony DiTerlizzi.
Easy you say? Ha! Well, it was ... Today, somebody had the bright idea of adding emails to the master ticket list. The list had the ticket number, person's name in two fields, if the ticket was mailed, how much, how they paid, etc. So the boss alphabetized the list and we set a volunteer to typing in the emails (given to us by the participant). Luckily, the retired volunteer has eagle eyes and noticed that the lines weren't reading across correctly. The boss was going to "undo" and re-alphabetize when she noticed the amount paid for someone she knew was wrong and she said, "I'm worried." Knowing full well that I had entered the correct amounts (because I knew that person too), I went back to my desk where the original list was correct. In other words, the list the volunteer was using was completely FUBAR. We finally figured out it was because I had frozen the panes in Excel in order to continue to be able to read the headings after scrolling down 180 lines. The boss knows how to alphabetize a whole row of columns (I didn't), but she doesn't know how to freeze panes (I do). I think we have that second list on the right path, but I'll tell ya, I'm still keeping my master list pristine. We'll need it (alphabetized) at the door and the email addys won't be needed there.
Lisa and I have packed up everything we need to bring and that includes a zillion t-shirts and bags for them. If you buy a t-shirt, Tony will autograph them. So, of course, we're bringing fabric markers, special markers for the art, signs, cash boxes, cash banks for the boxes, scissors, tape ... well, you get the idea. It's like camping but we won't have to pee in the woods.
Finally at 5 p.m. tonight, I left work totally spent. All of us have been in high gear for two solid weeks. Anyway, I went to the supermarket and ordered fish and chips to go. I was disappointed that my favorite young cook/fish monger wasn't there. He's a 'long drink of water' as my grandmother used to say and, man, can he cook fish! He's also nice and friendly. Instead there was a very gloomy guy who waited on the woman (who was scowling) in front of me and quickly turned to me. I could barely hear his one word: o.k. Wandering around the supermarket for the obligatory ten minutes I debated whether I should be annoyed. Deciding that I was too tired to be annoyed I went in search of a treat for Lisa's and my lunch. A mini chocolate cake seemed to fill the bill and I know Sharon will like it when she comes to my house to change into her fancy dress before the Sammys.
Getting back to the fish counter, grumpy lady got her order and the guy slung my bag on the counter and turned away without even looking at me. He went back to the cooking area and I called out, "Thank you!" He looked at me and smiled, saying, "You're welcome." I hope I wasn't the first one to acknowledge him and his work.
The cook/fish monger was the first time I had seen a black person working in that store. Meanwhile, as I waited for the fish to cook, the Asian sushi chef -- a young kid -- was complaining bitterly to a white woman about the working conditions. Maybe diversity isn't going so well there??
*************************************************************************
It has finally dawned on me why I feel so lousy -- it's spring. I've got spring fever which for me means itchy watery eyes, headache, snarfly nose, etc. Darn! I wanted to enjoy those crocus without these symptoms. Oh yeah, I look in the mirror in the morning and I look like I've been up drinking all night. Those puffy eyes are very alluring. (Insert sarcasm font here.)
**************************************************************************
Patrons are getting just as much fun and as smiles out of my "chickened" office as I am. They are truly amazed by the plethora of chickens. They also are happy chickens.
Gotta go to bed. It's way late. Ciao.
Today's the day, the culmination of six months of planning. The Sammy Awards (first ever!) are tonight. It has been paperwork mayhem. O.k., o.k., pushing papers is what I do. But triple the usual amount and you get the idea.
So I've been tracking every ticket sold and for the first month, it was only $100 tickets. After April 1, there were $40 tickets, but for $40 you don't get a giclee of an original painting of Sammy the Owl numbered and signed by the artist, Tony DiTerlizzi.
Easy you say? Ha! Well, it was ... Today, somebody had the bright idea of adding emails to the master ticket list. The list had the ticket number, person's name in two fields, if the ticket was mailed, how much, how they paid, etc. So the boss alphabetized the list and we set a volunteer to typing in the emails (given to us by the participant). Luckily, the retired volunteer has eagle eyes and noticed that the lines weren't reading across correctly. The boss was going to "undo" and re-alphabetize when she noticed the amount paid for someone she knew was wrong and she said, "I'm worried." Knowing full well that I had entered the correct amounts (because I knew that person too), I went back to my desk where the original list was correct. In other words, the list the volunteer was using was completely FUBAR. We finally figured out it was because I had frozen the panes in Excel in order to continue to be able to read the headings after scrolling down 180 lines. The boss knows how to alphabetize a whole row of columns (I didn't), but she doesn't know how to freeze panes (I do). I think we have that second list on the right path, but I'll tell ya, I'm still keeping my master list pristine. We'll need it (alphabetized) at the door and the email addys won't be needed there.
Lisa and I have packed up everything we need to bring and that includes a zillion t-shirts and bags for them. If you buy a t-shirt, Tony will autograph them. So, of course, we're bringing fabric markers, special markers for the art, signs, cash boxes, cash banks for the boxes, scissors, tape ... well, you get the idea. It's like camping but we won't have to pee in the woods.
Finally at 5 p.m. tonight, I left work totally spent. All of us have been in high gear for two solid weeks. Anyway, I went to the supermarket and ordered fish and chips to go. I was disappointed that my favorite young cook/fish monger wasn't there. He's a 'long drink of water' as my grandmother used to say and, man, can he cook fish! He's also nice and friendly. Instead there was a very gloomy guy who waited on the woman (who was scowling) in front of me and quickly turned to me. I could barely hear his one word: o.k. Wandering around the supermarket for the obligatory ten minutes I debated whether I should be annoyed. Deciding that I was too tired to be annoyed I went in search of a treat for Lisa's and my lunch. A mini chocolate cake seemed to fill the bill and I know Sharon will like it when she comes to my house to change into her fancy dress before the Sammys.
Getting back to the fish counter, grumpy lady got her order and the guy slung my bag on the counter and turned away without even looking at me. He went back to the cooking area and I called out, "Thank you!" He looked at me and smiled, saying, "You're welcome." I hope I wasn't the first one to acknowledge him and his work.
The cook/fish monger was the first time I had seen a black person working in that store. Meanwhile, as I waited for the fish to cook, the Asian sushi chef -- a young kid -- was complaining bitterly to a white woman about the working conditions. Maybe diversity isn't going so well there??
*************************************************************************
It has finally dawned on me why I feel so lousy -- it's spring. I've got spring fever which for me means itchy watery eyes, headache, snarfly nose, etc. Darn! I wanted to enjoy those crocus without these symptoms. Oh yeah, I look in the mirror in the morning and I look like I've been up drinking all night. Those puffy eyes are very alluring. (Insert sarcasm font here.)
**************************************************************************
Patrons are getting just as much fun and as smiles out of my "chickened" office as I am. They are truly amazed by the plethora of chickens. They also are happy chickens.
Gotta go to bed. It's way late. Ciao.
Sunday, March 30, 2014
Rants, Rants, and More Rants
I'm annoyed because:
I'm too fat for Agent Gibbs, a.k.a Mark Harmon.
Ditto for Tom Selleck.
You see, if I had a lithe body, even though I am of mature years, I could press it up against these guys and whisper into their ears. Then their security would drag me off and I'd wake up heavily medicated.
**************************************************************************
I'm annoyed because when I went to the supermarket yesterday, hoping to get away with once again not cooking, there were no rotissiere chickens in the case. A woman standing there with an expectant look on her face said, "There aren't any more chickens -- they said it would be about 20 minutes. He's wrapping the last one for me." It was then that I had this mental cartoon-like image of us wrestling each other to the floor in a life or death struggle over the last chicken. I moved on quietly. Actually, I told her of my brain cartoon and she only looked around for help for a short time.
***************************************************************************
I'm annoyed because it has been raining for two days and everyone here is so happy that it's not snow that they don't even notice that it is dank, DANK, I say. Bah humbug.
****************************************************************************
I'm annoyed because even though the crockpot chicken in marinara sauce came out wonderful and was yummy with pasta for lunch, now I have to figure out something for supper.
*****************************************************************************
I'm annoyed because I have been called a racist. Again. No, I didn't do anything. We have had a kid or two scrawling racist graffitti (aimed at a black teacher) in the bathrooms of the high school. Said teacher told the School Committee that the schools and whole Town are inherently, institutionally, racist. Don't I have to be some kind of participant in the offense to be branded?
Since the incidents (see: Larry Kelley's blog Only in the Republic of Amherst), there have been meetings galore and now the schools are going to have anti-racist programs. There are two separate groups using rooms at the Library holding meetings to try to combat this racism. (Why two different groups -- in addition to the NAACP-- I wonder?)
*****************************************************************************
Finally, I am annoyed and really angry that my petition for an upgrade has been denied. Again. Somewhere around 1995, with the other boss, we asked to have my position upgraded. They just re-did my job description, adding more duties.
Two years ago, my then new boss supported an upgrade of two steps (with documentation). It was denied.
About 8 months ago, we asked again, with more documentation of increased responsibility and duties. I was put in with the professionals' job review (even though I am not on a professional level). They asked what I do and we told them. The human resource consultant thought an upgrade would be a slam dunk when she spoke with my boss and me. What happened? Town of Amherst Human Resources said no upgrade and they added the extra duties to my job description with no added compensation. I again looked at the job descriptions of those positions two grades above me -- they have fewer responsibilities and fewer tasks. And, to top it all off -- I cannot 'work to rule' because they added all of those extra duties to my current job descriptions.
******************************************************************************
O.k., I'm done griping. I just had chocolate molten cake and it's yummy. Who knew that a mix I bought about two years ago could be so good? My daughters love to go spelunking in my food cupboard and throw out expired things. Ha! I'm going to eat them before those kids go nuts.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
It dawned on me that since I found Stephen Wright's blog, I haven't written here. I feel inadequate next to his writing. However, I would not want to go national the way he does -- boy, does he get criticism!! All of the crazies love to glom onto him. I like being the only crazy here just fine, thank you.
********************************************************************************
I love the Upworthy posts on FaceBook -- even if they do make me think. But today's post by Stephen Fry (the actor) about Humanism explained a lot to me. He's basically an atheist and he was saying even though there is no divine plan (in his opinion), we can all make ourselves happy by just living life to the fullest. It was such a simple and straightforward explanation that I now know why on Baptist minister preached a whole sermon about the evils of Humanism. Because Humanists go one step further than, "We don't need no steenking priests," right on to, "We don't need no God."
I know you're not supposed to discuss religion and politics at work, but I thought it was o.k. with good friends at home. Yesterday I observed that I thought a woman who is going through a terrible family problem is probably going through these trials due to her bad karma resulting from years of being downright nasty. My friend said to me, 'You were raised Catholic -- how can you believe in karma?' I didn't have an adequate answer then, but I was thinking, 'What about the do unto others thing?' What about the concept of hell if you don't behave?
I know bad things happen to good people and that makes the above nonsense. But I really feel there's a germ of truth in there.
8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888
So, the other day, I had to register several people at work for a conference in Worcester. The conference administrator needed a tally of who wanted chicken or vegetarian for lunch. So I was getting emails such as: chicken, chicken, rubber chicken, chicken, and CHICKEN! <--- Actually that was a colored cartoon about 6 inches high of a yellow chicken with red accents. It was clip art that my boss had sent to be funny. And it is that -- funny. I laughed out loud. So I did a copy and paste so I could print out the chicken and put him on my bulletin board.
My work computer is weird. (Now wait a minute, there's a point to this. I have not gone totally soft yet.) If I do a control C (copy) and then do a control V (paste), it works fine. The next time I highlight something else and copy and paste, I get the first thing all over again. (Every time.)
So after printing out the chicken, I was copying a form letter to thank a donor and pasted it onto letterhead. And I got CHICKEN! Sigh.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Well, it's time to think about supper. I usually eat it with 60 Minutes (7 p.m.). Do you think they would notice at the supermarket that I'm still wearing jammies when I go look for a rotissiere chicken?
I'm too fat for Agent Gibbs, a.k.a Mark Harmon.
Ditto for Tom Selleck.
You see, if I had a lithe body, even though I am of mature years, I could press it up against these guys and whisper into their ears. Then their security would drag me off and I'd wake up heavily medicated.
**************************************************************************
I'm annoyed because when I went to the supermarket yesterday, hoping to get away with once again not cooking, there were no rotissiere chickens in the case. A woman standing there with an expectant look on her face said, "There aren't any more chickens -- they said it would be about 20 minutes. He's wrapping the last one for me." It was then that I had this mental cartoon-like image of us wrestling each other to the floor in a life or death struggle over the last chicken. I moved on quietly. Actually, I told her of my brain cartoon and she only looked around for help for a short time.
***************************************************************************
I'm annoyed because it has been raining for two days and everyone here is so happy that it's not snow that they don't even notice that it is dank, DANK, I say. Bah humbug.
****************************************************************************
I'm annoyed because even though the crockpot chicken in marinara sauce came out wonderful and was yummy with pasta for lunch, now I have to figure out something for supper.
*****************************************************************************
I'm annoyed because I have been called a racist. Again. No, I didn't do anything. We have had a kid or two scrawling racist graffitti (aimed at a black teacher) in the bathrooms of the high school. Said teacher told the School Committee that the schools and whole Town are inherently, institutionally, racist. Don't I have to be some kind of participant in the offense to be branded?
Since the incidents (see: Larry Kelley's blog Only in the Republic of Amherst), there have been meetings galore and now the schools are going to have anti-racist programs. There are two separate groups using rooms at the Library holding meetings to try to combat this racism. (Why two different groups -- in addition to the NAACP-- I wonder?)
*****************************************************************************
Finally, I am annoyed and really angry that my petition for an upgrade has been denied. Again. Somewhere around 1995, with the other boss, we asked to have my position upgraded. They just re-did my job description, adding more duties.
Two years ago, my then new boss supported an upgrade of two steps (with documentation). It was denied.
About 8 months ago, we asked again, with more documentation of increased responsibility and duties. I was put in with the professionals' job review (even though I am not on a professional level). They asked what I do and we told them. The human resource consultant thought an upgrade would be a slam dunk when she spoke with my boss and me. What happened? Town of Amherst Human Resources said no upgrade and they added the extra duties to my job description with no added compensation. I again looked at the job descriptions of those positions two grades above me -- they have fewer responsibilities and fewer tasks. And, to top it all off -- I cannot 'work to rule' because they added all of those extra duties to my current job descriptions.
******************************************************************************
O.k., I'm done griping. I just had chocolate molten cake and it's yummy. Who knew that a mix I bought about two years ago could be so good? My daughters love to go spelunking in my food cupboard and throw out expired things. Ha! I'm going to eat them before those kids go nuts.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
It dawned on me that since I found Stephen Wright's blog, I haven't written here. I feel inadequate next to his writing. However, I would not want to go national the way he does -- boy, does he get criticism!! All of the crazies love to glom onto him. I like being the only crazy here just fine, thank you.
********************************************************************************
I love the Upworthy posts on FaceBook -- even if they do make me think. But today's post by Stephen Fry (the actor) about Humanism explained a lot to me. He's basically an atheist and he was saying even though there is no divine plan (in his opinion), we can all make ourselves happy by just living life to the fullest. It was such a simple and straightforward explanation that I now know why on Baptist minister preached a whole sermon about the evils of Humanism. Because Humanists go one step further than, "We don't need no steenking priests," right on to, "We don't need no God."
I know you're not supposed to discuss religion and politics at work, but I thought it was o.k. with good friends at home. Yesterday I observed that I thought a woman who is going through a terrible family problem is probably going through these trials due to her bad karma resulting from years of being downright nasty. My friend said to me, 'You were raised Catholic -- how can you believe in karma?' I didn't have an adequate answer then, but I was thinking, 'What about the do unto others thing?' What about the concept of hell if you don't behave?
I know bad things happen to good people and that makes the above nonsense. But I really feel there's a germ of truth in there.
8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888
So, the other day, I had to register several people at work for a conference in Worcester. The conference administrator needed a tally of who wanted chicken or vegetarian for lunch. So I was getting emails such as: chicken, chicken, rubber chicken, chicken, and CHICKEN! <--- Actually that was a colored cartoon about 6 inches high of a yellow chicken with red accents. It was clip art that my boss had sent to be funny. And it is that -- funny. I laughed out loud. So I did a copy and paste so I could print out the chicken and put him on my bulletin board.
My work computer is weird. (Now wait a minute, there's a point to this. I have not gone totally soft yet.) If I do a control C (copy) and then do a control V (paste), it works fine. The next time I highlight something else and copy and paste, I get the first thing all over again. (Every time.)
So after printing out the chicken, I was copying a form letter to thank a donor and pasted it onto letterhead. And I got CHICKEN! Sigh.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Well, it's time to think about supper. I usually eat it with 60 Minutes (7 p.m.). Do you think they would notice at the supermarket that I'm still wearing jammies when I go look for a rotissiere chicken?
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Spring Ahead
I trust you have all reconciled yourself to the fact that the clocks had to be moved ahead one hour last night. Personally, this changing the clock bit bugs me. It supposedly was instituted to help the farmers, who now have electricity, so why do we have to change things? I was just rejoicing in the fact that when I leave work it's not totally dark, and now it's all artificially light. Well, more light than it should be. Isn't Noon always at the same time? What is this nonsense exactly?
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I am distressed by the Blarney Blowout. Yesterday, due to excessive drinking, 58 college aged kids were arrested and more were summonsed (I think that means ticketed). As my friend, Ann, says: They have too much money and too much time on their hands.
She and I were reminiscing about out undergraduate days. I did as little studying as possible, but I did work part time and beer or alcohol wasn't really my bag (luckily). She, on the other hand, studied a lot and perhaps had a part time job too. But neither of us had enough money to buy a six pack, let alone buy drinks at a bar!
It was a gorgeous sunny day in the 50's and most kids went out to see and be seen and maybe have a beer or two. A few went to get so drunk that they couldn't walk. I was returning from Northampton around Noon and I saw two ambulances about 10 to 15 minutes apart going to the emergency room. There were already problems.
In the "old days," they called it Kegs and Eggs and we all said, "Ewww ... eggs and beer!" Some of the kids did indeed start that early, but it wasn't in any way as rowdy as this. I guess it's because everyone is texting everyone else and they are telling their friends where to go to meet up or witness one of the many fights.
Our police were criticized for using non lethal force -- pepper spray and smoke bombs -- to disperse the crowds. These are public safety officers, many in full riot gear, who were greeted with a hail of snow balls, ice chunks, full beer bottles and cans, etc. We still had four officers injured.
While I know the majority of UMass students were not participating, I think we all -- including current students and administrators -- need to figure out a way to stop this ridiculous disturbance. If it means closing all of the bars and liquor stores in Amherst on that day, let's do it. Let them buy their liquor in Hadley and bring it to their dorm room on campus.
Aftermath: About 100 students protested the "overexcessive use of force" by the Amherst Police. I guess they have never heard of Kent State (or seen the photo). Do you suppose they have heard of Rodney King? They don't know what excessive force is.
We protested the Viet Nam war and they protest when cops tell a drunken crowd to disperse.
I can barely swim, it's getting so shallow.
*****************************************************************************
Today is a day that you can really feel spring coming on. It's in the 40's and really sunny. The snow banks at the end of the driveways are down to 3 or 4 feet, the birds are chirping in the morning ... did someone send the birds a memo saying, "It's March, get your tail feathers out there in the a.m.!"? I heard birds singing as I went out to work the other morning and thought I had been transported to the town center and was hearing the audible crosswalk light in Town.
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March 19, 2014
As you may have guessed, the above was written the Sunday BEFORE March 17th. We've had more bitterly cold weather, but today was in the 40's and great ... for a ride to Charlestown. It only took me two and a half hours today but I can't figure out if it's because my new GPS sent me a different way or if it was because I left 15 minutes early. (Yes, of course I can figure it out by Googling the time for the different routes, but I'm too lazy.)
I know it's hard for you to believe, but my wheels started turning at 6:45 a.m. Luckily, for those at the union hall, the coffee was ready. I can't drink or eat anything before I leave. I can't imagine how bad it would be to be stuck in traffic in Framingham and have to go.
I got my usual dose of angst when someone, whose expertise in his job is almost nil, was disrespectful to me. This is a staff person no less. But he has kissed the correct asses and remains the golden boy. Actually, I think he has "the goods" on the people who insist on retaining him. Why do I persist? Why do I put up with this manure? (I actually need it for the garden.)
I just keep having this nagging feeling that I can effect change and make some things better with the union management. Today, however, I was reminded of the phrase: Power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely.
*****************************************************************************
I was reading the Deployment Health today (from Walter Reed -- it's online) and was grabbed by a picture of two Marines in an airplane grimacing in pain from wounds they received in Afghanistan. After that, I read the UMass Alumni News (also online) and read that the University received a grant of thousands of dollars to assist Afghan women get education. Irony.
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Heard in a local supermarket: Are these local asparagus? No ma'm. Why can't we have local asparagus?
BECAUSE THERE'S STILL TWO FREAKIN' FEET OF SNOW, YOU JERK. <-- That's me. Does she think the plants are pushing up through the snow? (BTW, there's less snow because it was warm today.) Does she think someone is growing greenhouse asparagus? Yeah, and selling it for $12 a spear. Sheesh.
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It was just sleeting a couple of hours ago. We went from sunny and in the high 40's to sleeting. Is it any wonder why I'm just a bit testy?
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So I went to the dentist ... again. Yes, another crown. I've paid enough in dental bills that I should get a real crown. Anyway, I'm in the chair bleeding like crazy and the dentist says, "That's some really angry tissue there." And I said to him, "Yeah, well, if you would stop poking sharp objects at it, it probably wouldn't be so angry." Bah humbug.
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****************************************************************************
I am distressed by the Blarney Blowout. Yesterday, due to excessive drinking, 58 college aged kids were arrested and more were summonsed (I think that means ticketed). As my friend, Ann, says: They have too much money and too much time on their hands.
She and I were reminiscing about out undergraduate days. I did as little studying as possible, but I did work part time and beer or alcohol wasn't really my bag (luckily). She, on the other hand, studied a lot and perhaps had a part time job too. But neither of us had enough money to buy a six pack, let alone buy drinks at a bar!
It was a gorgeous sunny day in the 50's and most kids went out to see and be seen and maybe have a beer or two. A few went to get so drunk that they couldn't walk. I was returning from Northampton around Noon and I saw two ambulances about 10 to 15 minutes apart going to the emergency room. There were already problems.
In the "old days," they called it Kegs and Eggs and we all said, "Ewww ... eggs and beer!" Some of the kids did indeed start that early, but it wasn't in any way as rowdy as this. I guess it's because everyone is texting everyone else and they are telling their friends where to go to meet up or witness one of the many fights.
Our police were criticized for using non lethal force -- pepper spray and smoke bombs -- to disperse the crowds. These are public safety officers, many in full riot gear, who were greeted with a hail of snow balls, ice chunks, full beer bottles and cans, etc. We still had four officers injured.
While I know the majority of UMass students were not participating, I think we all -- including current students and administrators -- need to figure out a way to stop this ridiculous disturbance. If it means closing all of the bars and liquor stores in Amherst on that day, let's do it. Let them buy their liquor in Hadley and bring it to their dorm room on campus.
Aftermath: About 100 students protested the "overexcessive use of force" by the Amherst Police. I guess they have never heard of Kent State (or seen the photo). Do you suppose they have heard of Rodney King? They don't know what excessive force is.
We protested the Viet Nam war and they protest when cops tell a drunken crowd to disperse.
I can barely swim, it's getting so shallow.
*****************************************************************************
Today is a day that you can really feel spring coming on. It's in the 40's and really sunny. The snow banks at the end of the driveways are down to 3 or 4 feet, the birds are chirping in the morning ... did someone send the birds a memo saying, "It's March, get your tail feathers out there in the a.m.!"? I heard birds singing as I went out to work the other morning and thought I had been transported to the town center and was hearing the audible crosswalk light in Town.
*******************************************************************************
March 19, 2014
As you may have guessed, the above was written the Sunday BEFORE March 17th. We've had more bitterly cold weather, but today was in the 40's and great ... for a ride to Charlestown. It only took me two and a half hours today but I can't figure out if it's because my new GPS sent me a different way or if it was because I left 15 minutes early. (Yes, of course I can figure it out by Googling the time for the different routes, but I'm too lazy.)
I know it's hard for you to believe, but my wheels started turning at 6:45 a.m. Luckily, for those at the union hall, the coffee was ready. I can't drink or eat anything before I leave. I can't imagine how bad it would be to be stuck in traffic in Framingham and have to go.
I got my usual dose of angst when someone, whose expertise in his job is almost nil, was disrespectful to me. This is a staff person no less. But he has kissed the correct asses and remains the golden boy. Actually, I think he has "the goods" on the people who insist on retaining him. Why do I persist? Why do I put up with this manure? (I actually need it for the garden.)
I just keep having this nagging feeling that I can effect change and make some things better with the union management. Today, however, I was reminded of the phrase: Power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely.
*****************************************************************************
I was reading the Deployment Health today (from Walter Reed -- it's online) and was grabbed by a picture of two Marines in an airplane grimacing in pain from wounds they received in Afghanistan. After that, I read the UMass Alumni News (also online) and read that the University received a grant of thousands of dollars to assist Afghan women get education. Irony.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Heard in a local supermarket: Are these local asparagus? No ma'm. Why can't we have local asparagus?
BECAUSE THERE'S STILL TWO FREAKIN' FEET OF SNOW, YOU JERK. <-- That's me. Does she think the plants are pushing up through the snow? (BTW, there's less snow because it was warm today.) Does she think someone is growing greenhouse asparagus? Yeah, and selling it for $12 a spear. Sheesh.
*******************************************************************************
It was just sleeting a couple of hours ago. We went from sunny and in the high 40's to sleeting. Is it any wonder why I'm just a bit testy?
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
So I went to the dentist ... again. Yes, another crown. I've paid enough in dental bills that I should get a real crown. Anyway, I'm in the chair bleeding like crazy and the dentist says, "That's some really angry tissue there." And I said to him, "Yeah, well, if you would stop poking sharp objects at it, it probably wouldn't be so angry." Bah humbug.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Monday, February 17, 2014
Presidents' Day
I LOVE days off!
Lunch was warm salmon on two kinds of lettuce, cukes, and wine vinagrette dressing.
I decided to make a baby quilt. This is as far as I got.
Lunch was warm salmon on two kinds of lettuce, cukes, and wine vinagrette dressing.
I decided to make a baby quilt. This is as far as I got.
This panel is called "Hey Diddle Diddle" for obvious reasons. Yes, I did iron it before adding to it!
Then you make sashing. Most people (not quilters) call this a border.
Below is the backing (aqua), then the polyester batting (white stuff) and the finished quilt top on top.
The next step is for me to pin that sucker all over the place. Then I can tie it, which is a very old form of quilting. It's double double knots no more than four inches apart. Tying or sewing through the three layers is the actual quilting. Making the top is piecing. Finally, it needs to be bound. This is when I always hope that fairies come in and do this, but it never happens.
Saturday, February 15, 2014
Saturday After One Day of Work
It was a little hard yesterday to get back to business. Of course it was that dumb Valentine's Day. Luckily, my boss brought in heart shaped Dunkin Donuts filled with brownies. If I have to put up with all of that love mush, I might as well have good coffee and a doughnut. (I bought some really great French roast coffee for the Keurig at work.)
So today, I was determined to be useful. I decided to make bread, which I haven't done in years. I had bought more flour, but couldn't find yeast so I gave up. You would think the yeast would be near the flour in the supermarket, wouldn't you?) The yeast I have is a bit old, so I proofed it.
So today, I was determined to be useful. I decided to make bread, which I haven't done in years. I had bought more flour, but couldn't find yeast so I gave up. You would think the yeast would be near the flour in the supermarket, wouldn't you?) The yeast I have is a bit old, so I proofed it.
Those bubbles mean the yeast is alive. It's alive!!
After adding all of the ingredients, I had to 'set the dough to rise for one hour.'
Here's the bread rising under a tea towel that my cheeky devil Aussie friend sent to me. You even get a recipe with this towel!
So I went off to Jazzercise which is one hour of aerobics. Yes, I took ibuprophen first. Came back -- my bread was not risen. (It eventually took over 2 hours.) As Ann said, "No alleluia." Hmpf. But after the second rising, I baked it.
Mmmm, bread!
See how it's artfully placed? Ann and I HAD to taste it so there are a couple of slices missing from the right side. It's good and the kitchen smells amazing. I'm thinking, however, that I have to get something with more ingredients. It has been so long since I've had plain white bread, I was like, "Eh." Maybe I'll try oatmeal bread. That would be a fave. Maybe I'll make croutons ....
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Before Ann came over, I was busy in the sewing room. (Sorry, about the spoiler, Mom.)
As some of you know, my mother delights in making her grandchildren and me laugh. So when we're in a casino (in California, on board a ship), she loves to reach in between her breasts and dig around. She comes up with money because she has a woman's money pouch attached to her bra strap. Last time we were together, she said she would like a new one.
I don't know what store I was in, but I saw these "instant camisoles" that will cover up cleavage. It's just a triangle of fabric that you attach to each bra strap. And I thought, 'I can make that into a money pouch!'
Left is front of money pouch; right is back of the "skin tone" pouch.
Yes, I know -- they look like plus sized g-strings. They will not only hold a lot of dough, they could even hide her passport. Come to think of it, she could add glasses, phone, coins, and a snack! There are a lot of advantages to being a Jane Russell type!
Since Ann was coming over and she always admires my glass collection, I decided it was time to dust the 3 inches of dust off the baker's rack. One of these days, I'll get the toter full of other pieces and switch them out, but I settled for rearranging the colors.
I know, I know -- crummy shot. But it's %$#@ snowing again and almost sunset. I think we had a half hour of sun today. But there's no dust ...
Ann had me stuffing the little (about 3.5 inches high) dogs that she has sewn. I observed that I never thought I'd spend a Saturday shoving stuffing up a dog's ass and she observed, 'Better the dog than you.' She's tough. At one point, I didn't see that she had another dog for me to stuff and she said, "What are you? On break?" It's a darn good thing she didn't make a union crack at that juncture. (We are at totally opposite ends of the political spectrum.)
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We have Monday off because it's President's Day. Remember when we knew when Lincoln's and Washington's birthdays were? Now, I guess, we are honoring all presidents. Does Silent Cal get honored? Apparently, he wasn't any more talkative when he was in Northampton. Although he is the one credited with calling it Paradise City. (Yes, that is Northampton, Mass. that Archer Mayor writes about. Try his books, you might like them.)
Anyway, it's another day off and another day to get me used to hibernating at home. When I do have to go back into work, I am loath to do it and it's not because I don't want to see the people or do the work. A body at rest ...
So all of this no work stuff got me to thinking an calculating. My next trip to Palm Springs will be in April after we are done with the Sammy Awards on April 10th.
The Library will honor Norton Juster, author of The Phantom Toll Booth. (There will be two other honorees, but I'm talking about Norton here.) I did not know of the book and it turns out that some school systems use it in their curriculum. I learned that when a college student almost fainted after Norton had walked into the Library and I mentioned his name. All of this is to say, Norton Juster is a STAR. Tollbooth is in its 50th year and still going strong.
And so is Norton. He is a lovely man, a delight to talk to, and he loves his granddaughter (and I'm sure the rest of his family) dearly. I am a better person for knowing him. His good buddy and flat mate is/was Jules Feiffer, of New Yorker cartoonist fame. Jules changed my life when I saw "Ode to Spring" which is a grown woman cavorting and dancing to spring. That image has stayed in my brain for many years and always reminds me to cavort.
Cheers!
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